- Your husband comes home at 9 pm and you're shocked at how early he's home.
- You find yourself screaming obscenities at the TV show that has a minor character involved in medicine (Looking at you, The Glades) because they keep getting everything wrong.
- You find yourself translating and reading the scripts for the pharmacist.
- You have a pile of papers that you don't look at cuz it might (but never does because all of that stuff stays at the hospital, you're just crazy) have patient information on it.
- You find yourself going to more functions alone than you do with your husband.
- You don't bother going into the doctor for most ailments, instead you either hijack your husband when he gets home or you grab his med equipment and use it yourself.
- You have more conversations with your dog (or cat) than you do with your spouse.
- You're in a long distance relationship, but you're still in the same city
- You use the terms "lacerations", "contusions", and "ecchymosis" instead of "cuts", "scrapes", and "bruises".
- You realize that you're having a panic attack because the children's toys are making noises and it sounds like his beeper/pager/phone thing (which would mean that he left it home and that the world just might come to an end).
- You take pictures of you and your husband together just so that people will stop thinking that you've made him up. Seriously guys, he exists I tell you!
- You notice that the docs have stopped asking you questions and instead direct them at your hubby. You're not entirely sure if this is for diagnostic purposes or for pimping...
- You schedule your OBGYN visits based on the call schedule, just in case the doc on that service is actually a friend. No one wants to have dinner with someone who's seen their hoo hoo when that someone isn't their husband.
- You understand exactly where the Dowager Countess is coming from with this
*Pimping is a medical term for when Attending Doctors ask Underling Doctors (so...interns and residents) questions. I have yet to determine if its done to help learning or if its done just to trip up the underling.
